


Unexpected

by BleedingSparkles



Category: Batman - Fandom, Joker and Harley Quinn - Fandom, Suicide Squad (2016), joker/harley - Fandom
Genre: Batman - Freeform, Childbirth, Domestic arguments, F/M, Fluff, Harley Quinn - Freeform, Joker and harley baby, One Shot, Original Character(s), Pain, Suicide Squad, The Joker - Freeform, The Joker/Harley Quinn - Freeform, Unplanned Pregnancy, unknown pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-06-03
Packaged: 2019-05-17 19:59:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14838221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BleedingSparkles/pseuds/BleedingSparkles
Summary: Harley Quinn complains of a terrible stomach ache so The Joker calls for their doctor to check her out, who informs them of a terrifying discovery. (one shot)





	Unexpected

It was nine in the evening on the 31st of March; The Joker was deep in his work trying to prepare for April fool’s day. They always plan something big every year, and he had been in his study all day trying to think of the perfect scheme. After not having yet come up with anything and being surrounded by screwed up pieces of paper, he sighed heavily and began massaging the sides of his temple before leaving to take a break. He headed towards the living room where he could hear the TV blaring; he entered the room to find Harley curled up in a ball on their large black leather sofa in her light blue pyjama top and shorts, underneath a thick pink blanket while groaning to herself. 

“What’s the matter with you?” he asked from the doorway with a hint of anger in his voice, She jumped slightly and changed into a seating position at his sudden presence. “Nothing Puddin, I’ve just got a bit of a stomach ache” she smiled tiredly.  
“You better not be coming down with something,” he threatened as he then slumped down into his crimson red armchair.  
She muted the TV and proceeded to lean on the armrest of the sofa, “I haven’t been sick though, I may have just got a bit of food poisoning from lunch”  
“I ate the same thing as you and I’m fine” he grumbled, while staring at the soundless TV screen.  
Harley only shrugged and re wrapped herself in the blanket, “how’s the plan going?” The Joker grunted in response and propped his head up on his hand, “that good huh? Well you’ll think of something” she chirped,  
“I’m just taking a short break” he muttered as he then reached for the remote and began flicking through the channels.

Half an hour later Harley’s stomach ache still hadn’t subsided, in fact it had gotten worse. She kept that to herself though for now, The Joker didn’t seem to notice her going ridged whenever a wave of pain hit, she didn’t want her Puddin to think she’d be unfit to help him celebrate one of their favourite holidays. After he returned to his study, she went straight back to clutching her stomach and groaning in pain. The pain felt somewhat similar to menstruation cramps only slightly different, but the fact that she wasn't due on yet was quite confusing to her. Another half an hour later she had finally had enough, and decided to go to bed early and hope that she feels better in the morning. She was lucky enough to be able to sneak past The Jokers study on her way to the bedroom as he was obviously still working, and by the silence it seemed that he may have thought of something, otherwise he’d been cursing and no doubt damaging the furniture.

Later that night when The Joker had joined her and was fast asleep lying next to her, the pain had intensified dramatically and she was beginning to panic. She checked the time on the bedside clock to find that it had just gone two. She groaned audibly and decided to sit up as another wave hit her and her body tensed up again. She glanced at J who was still sleeping peacefully, completely un-fazed by her movements. She paused for a second as she hugged her stomach; considering the consequences of what she was about to do, but she at this point had no choice. “J?” she whispered desperately, she got no response so she began to gently shake him with one hand, “Puddin?” He growled angrily and shoved her arm away “Puddin please” she begged.  
instead of cooperating he rolled over away from her “go to sleep!”

“I can’t” she whimpered “my stomach hurts so bad,” he growled again but reluctantly turned back over before leaning up on his elbow with lidded eyes. “What are you talking about?” he asked in a sleepy voice through gritted teeth,  
“I told you I had a stomach ache earlier” she groaned as she hugged her stomach again. The Joker rubbed his eyes “you still got that?” Harley merely nodded, “what type of pain is it?” he then asked, she hissed and leaned forward instinctively “a sharp one and it’s worse than earlier, a LOT worse” she managed to croak out. At this point The Joker had gotten out of bed and turned on the light; Harley quickly lay back down and shielded her eyes from the harsh light now filling the room, Joker then roughly pulled her hands away as she continued to whimper, his face was filled with concentration as he began to study her. She did looked incredibly tired, extra pale and her skin was glistening with sweat. He quickly placed one of his hands on her forehead and around her neck; she was burning up. 

The Joker moved away from the bed and opened the bedroom door “Frost, get our doctor over here now!” he shouted angrily down the corridor. His right hand man, who had been getting things ready for April fool’s day downstairs, jumped at the unexpected outburst, but quickly pulled out his phone. “Sure thing boss!” he called back, “what do you want me to tell him?”  
“Harley has an intense pain in her stomach!”  
Frost then quickly dialled the number. 

Their doctor arrived just 10 minutes later and hurried to the bedroom with Frost and a henchman bringing his equipment, Harley was still lying on the bed and The Joker was now pacing the room, in nothing but a pair of black tracksuit bottoms. Their doctor had shoulder length brown hair, a British accent and he wore a brown suite with his white doctor’s coat over the top. “What seems to be the problem?” he asked calmly as he approached Harley on the bed, “My stomach hurts!” she bellowed while in a fetal position.  
“Okay my love, I’m going to need you to lay on your back” he spoke as he sat down beside her, she slowly rolled over while moaning uncomfortably, “now, when did this start?”  
She moaned in thought “About seven hours ago?” The Joker was now sat on his side of the bed next to her as the Doctor began checking her temperature, while Frost stood in the corner.  
“And where is your pain?”  
She rubbed the area where the pain was most intense, which happened to be just below her belly button “in here." The doctor creased his face in thought before heading to get his stethoscope from his leather bag, “and what type of pain is it?”  
“It’s a really sharp pain that hits me in waves, and it’s been getting worse and lasts longer each time” she whimpered  
“Hmm, interesting” The Doctor muttered slowly as he put the stethoscope around his neck.

“What’s interesting?” The Joker interrupted quickly, the doctor ignored his question in order to listen to Harley’s heartbeat, which was beating rapidly. He then lifted up Harley’s shirt and placed the chest piece to different areas of her stomach, as she flinched at the cold sensation. The doctor suddenly looked incredibly concerned before sitting up straight.  
“What? What is it?” Harley asked in a panic,  
The doctor looked at her with a serious expression, “Within the last year, have you been experiencing nausea?”  
She looked at him puzzled before answering his question, “A little”  
“Moody?”  
“Um…”  
“Yes she has” the Joker answered, Harley quickly shot him a glare and was about to retort when the doctor continued,  
“Have you been menstruating?”  
She tilted her head at him “Yes, but what does any of this have to do with my stomach hurting?!” she asked with irritation  
“Yeah?” The Joker agreed.  
The doctor looked between them for a second, “Look I don’t wish to alarm you, but Harley I believe you are about to give birth.”  
“YOU WHAT?!” the couple shouted simultaneously,  
“DO I LOOK PREGNANT TO YOU?!” she hollered as she sprung up, but then instantly regretted it as another sharp pain shot through her body, causing her to lay back down again.

“It’s rare but it can happen” the doctor answered hastily, “If a woman has stronger stomach muscles, it is possible that they can go through an entire pregnancy without knowing it,” he continued. He then handed the stethoscope to The Joker, “have a listen; there is a second heartbeat.” The Joker snatched the thing out of his gasp, before proceeding to do so while Harley watched him intensely with worried eyes. After listening; The Joker froze on the spot and slowly sat up straight without blinking, he then handed the ear pieces to Harley so she could listen. “Oh god” she murmured fearfully once she placed them in her ears, the doctor then removed the stethoscope and put it down on the bedside table.

The two of them just sat there in horror, completely speechless and zoned out. The doctor swiftly snapped his fingers in front of them to bring them back to reality before giving out his instructions, “right we are going to need a bunch of warm towels and a large bowl of warm water.” Frost who had been watching the event unfold with little to no emotion, quickly left the room to retrieve the items, while the doctor convinced The Joker to prepared Harley by positioning her in the centre of the bed, putting all the pillows behind her and removing the necessary items of clothing. Soon after that, the bed filled with water coming from between her legs, and she let out a scream out of pure fear, which was something she didn’t do very often.

Once she was settled and now cleaned up; the doctor began preparing the after birth area on a table that one of the henchmen had retrieved from another room, while Harley was breathing heavily. “I can’t believe I’ve gone nine months without realising I was pregnant,” she moaned in disbelief “I’ve been fighting batsy, drinking and doing all kinds of things.”  
“Well to be fair,” The Joker began from his seat where he had been rocking back and forth on. “you drink very rarely, and you haven’t actually been badly injured by batsy this year,” She just groaned in response and rolled her head back. After a short pause The Joker began to look her up and down, “what are you staring at?” she grumbled angrily once she noticed his gaze,  
“Come to think of it, you have put on a little” he stated matter-of-factly. She gave him a hard glare as he continued, “But nowhere near enough to prove that there’s something in there,” he pointed to her belly before looking over at their doctor, “why is that?” he demanded sternly.

“Basically; the baby hasn’t been giving off enough of the pregnancy hormone which gives it what it needs, this child will be a lot smaller and thinner than most new-borns, ” the doctor answered from the side of the room where he was now preparing himself by applying his gloves, mask and apron.  
“Is that a bad thing?” Harley asked with concern,  
“Are you actually worried about that thing?” The Joker asked her in bewilderment,  
She looked up at him darkly, “Whether we planned this or not, this is still part of the both of us. I’ve always wanted a child as you know and it’s in my nature to care for it, unlike you” she told him, her voice laced with venom.  
“That’s you’re problem, you’ve always had a soft spot for those things”  
“Like you have a soft spot for me… sometimes,”  
“Well at least I hide that side from the public so it can’t be used against me, you can’t help yourself from swooning over children in need” he spoke bitterly.  
“Whatever” she muttered as she rolled her head over to the doctor, “anyway what were you saying doc?”

“The child may have a few health issues but I can’t decipher what they are at this point, but don’t worry, a lot of babies are born underweight and they turn out fine.” He then looked at The Joker “but I strongly recommend that you get your men to bring a NICU for the delivery, which is an intensive care unit designed to aid unwell infants.”  
“Fine” The Joker grumbled as he then grabbed his phone from his nightstand and left the room to make the call, as Harley watched him leave. 

Harley was trying to be as silent as possible, so she could hear The Jokers phone convocation. She was just about able to make out his demands, for someone who doesn’t care for the baby, he sure does sound desperate for the resources needed to keep it alive. When The Joker returned, Harley hadn’t moved yet she was giving him a warm smile despite her pain, as he sat down beside her. He ignored her gaze as her breathing began to quicken again, The Joker then looked at the doctor quizzically as he continued to fiddle with equipment in the corner. “I must say doc, you have brought quite a lot of equipment for such a situation,”  
“Well, when Mr Frost told me she was experiencing extreme abdominal pain I had to prepare for every possible scenario,” he told them as he then positioned himself at the end of the bed while Harley adjusted herself into the right position also. “It’s just as well you called me when you did, it probably wouldn’t have ended well otherwise,”  
“You’re telling me” The Joker responded before getting up to leave.  
“Oh no you don’t!” Harley growled as she grabbed his arm and pulled him back down onto the bed,  
“Get offa me woman!” he yelled back while trying to pry her grip off, “I don’t want to see this!”  
“I don’t care, this is a once in a lifetime experience!” she bellowed,  
“Yeah, an experience I don’t want!” he retorted back.  
“It’s your fault!”  
He was about to fire back when She suddenly screamed in pain, and gripped his wrist until her knuckles turned whiter than they already were. “Ow! Jesus Harley!” he cursed in pain as he gave up and let her yank him down next to her, she then entwined her fingers with his and dug her nails into his flesh as more pain was sure come.  
“My dear you need to use your energy for pushing, not screaming” The doctor coaxed,  
“I CAN’T HELP IT!” she screamed back as she continued to experience contractions.

After another 10 minutes of pushing, screaming and a lot of pain, something began to emerge from between her legs. The couple fell silent and watched as the doctor eased it onto the mattress, and awaited the cries of their unknown creation, but nothing. They weren’t even focusing on anything other than the fact that it wasn’t making any noise, or moving for that matter. From what they could see, It looked like nothing more than a slimy rag doll covered in blood. They barely got a chance to study it when the doctor quickly cut the cord, and carried it away to the corner in a white towel. They couldn’t see what he was doing, as his back was turned and the child wasn’t visible. They just stared at him as he was frantically trying to get the child to breath. They didn’t seem to know what to do other than wait and listen, motionless and silent as the tension in the air increased.

Suddenly as if at the flick of a switch, an ear deafening cry erupted from the corner. The tension instantly vanished as if the noise was a melody, even The Joker seemed to be affected. They could now make out the smallest, scrawniest limbs they had ever seen flailing in the air, as the doctor began to clean it. Harley instantly burst into tears of joy as The Joker narrowed his eyes at the colour of them; the limbs were paler than the towel it was being cleaned in. The realisation of the situation finally started to set in, as the doctor began to wrap the infant in a clean towel. “Congratulations, you two” the doctor began as he turned around, with the tiny infant who had a head of messy emerald green hair in his arms “you have a baby girl.” 

“gimme!” Harley shrieked happily as she reached out her arms,  
The doctor chuckled, “of cause but you can only have a quick hold I’m afraid, I need to secure her in the NICU,” He told them as he carefully handed her the child. She gasped in joy as she held her close, “She’s so beautiful” she sobbed again as she planted a soft kiss on her head, “how could I have not known about you?” she cooed to her as the child then opened her bright blue eyes.  
“Puddin, ain't she just the cutest” Harley gushed as she looked up at The Joker, Her smile quickly turned to confusion as He just stared at the infant as if she was an alien. “Puddin, do you want to hold her?” she asked softly, he didn’t respond so she took his silence as an answer and carefully passed her to him. He didn’t refuse. He hesitantly took her and rested her in the crook of his elbow and continued to stare, she looked straight up at him and he unconsciously stroked her soft head and smiled. The child was smaller than the length of his forearm, and she had barely any weight to her. 

“What would you two like to name her?” The doctor suddenly asked, The Jokers head shot up once he realised what he was doing. Harley looked back at Joker as if waiting for him to think of a name, He looked back down at the child who then yawned, his eyes widened like he was trying to fight the urge to adore her. “April” he answered quickly, “she was born on April fool’s day, her name is April.” 

“Puddin I love it!” Harley smiled, the doctor then continued to fill out the birth certificate. “Ya know, I was gonna say we should put her up for adoption” The Joker then spoke, Harley’s smile instantly vanished and she had a look of terror on her face. “But” he continued as he held up a finger, “We can’t if she looks like this.”  
Harley sighed in relief, “Quite right, puddin”  
“Guess what Harley” He then said with his infamous smile,  
“What?” she asked curiously,  
“We’ve got a new pet!”


End file.
